You know the drill, work in progress, gets locked down later, first few days are now locked down.( Long )
for. The intimate, consensual, bruises of that night that I remembered and he’d lost to time…I longed for it as my calls went unanswered.
I was not comfortable with these thoughts.
More bad news and conflicting reports at Reactor No 4 came to light, but I couldn’t process it.
I went online and asked friends and strangers for help in finding me a place to stay in Taipei if my friend fell through.
I had no idea if I would leave the following morning but I posted my travel information online.
I returned to having near-sleepless nights. Sometimes the earthquake alerts on my phone woke me. Sometimes new worries about friends in Tokyo woke me, sometimes it was thoughts of my former lover and his family. Most of the time it was the haunting images my rage brought me that kept me from sleep. I saw myself, face to face with my old friend, lashing out, hitting him beyond the point he could resist hitting back in self-defense, all in a drunken haze of ocean and crumbling concrete.
Sometimes the ocean of sleep took me, but often it tossed me back on land.