I’m a little under the weather. I had to cancel The Incredibles with Wataguy tonight. In my hazy, sleepy (perhaps feverish) stupor of tea and lj as I wait to go home I am trying to make sense of it. Yesterday afternoon my teacher emailed me, last night we hashed out details and this morning my co-workers are all saying “Whaaaaaaaaaa!!!!”
When I arrived to dance class last night my teacher started by pulling me aside to explain the TV gig and give her warnings which included, but were not limited to :n o letting them video tape you tonight or while not in costume. A quick headshot is probably okay. Gaijin #4 will be the leader, if there is anything to be choreographed she decides. Don’t let them offer you dance work directly without working through me. Don’t work for less than I agreed upon…and so on….
This is all about her wanting up to take our roles as dancers seriously, not undercutting her or other dancers, being professional at all times and blah blah blah. I understand her concern but she just kept hitting the points over and over until I wondered what sort of half-assed retards she might fear we’d be once she was in India (she’ll be out of the country during this gig) a few words of trust would have been appreciated. She stopped short of saying “don’t pick your nose on national TV…when you get excited don’t urinate yourself” but just barely. I’m used to seeing her in her normal state of bizarre-disorder and magical-goddess-farting-rainbows mode…the strange hardball street-smart side of her had only been hinted at with her hip-hop wear.
Oh, and for the record, I’ve also learned that when she’s in hardball mode she does NOT have a sense of humor. She didn’t take well to being called the Bestest Pimp Evaaaaa!! I did some verbal backtracking after that joke…and felt that to point out that people who don’t wish to be called pimps ought not to wear 3/4th length very-fake fur leopard print jackets would have been a mistake. I shut up.
After dance class our teacher, gaijin #2, and one Japanese classmate hopped into a cab to go to Cozmos for the weekly Goddess Night. In the cab our teacher covered all the points ad nausea for #2. #2 restrained from asking if we looked like drooling retards, but we’re both so happy with this new random adventure that we kept silent and just continued saying yes. Once again she also made sure we understood that gaijin #4 was in charge of any choreography or organization things that might occur. Totally fine with me but I am a little worried about her punctuality.
We arrived at Cozmos. After I made 20 minutes of small talk with one of the new Japanese students (who wanted to practice a little English) we watched Gaijin #3 and one non-gaijin fellow student perform. Gaijin #3 was in top form. Non-gaijin was very nervous and…after all was finished and she was changed into street clothes, broke down crying when I gave her a hug. I’m growing used to the cycle of hug-cry-cry-hug within our group. She WAS obviously nervous and stiff when she danced (painfully so) but she had nailed the zills and seemed to loose her fear when she used them…. I tried to focus her on that.
Then Gaijin #2 and I sat around for an hour, Gaijin #3joined after changing, and just as our order of meatless Nachos arrived we were waved back to the back table where our teacher, her husband, and a young producer in casual clothing awaited us…
We learn that this idol singer is going to appear on this stage wearing an Egyptian mask and we will dance and it will all be very Egyptian. I bet the first two points will be true.
Once again…our teacher isn’t loveable in hardball mode…but like her scatterbrained-share-the-love-mode, she means well and is just being very protective. Her husband escaped as soon as we appeared. We started hashing out costumes…none of us have the same style “Egyptian” costume...the only costume in common is tribal and you don’t stick a Cleopatra wig on tribal gals, so the network will make something (I email my measurements tonight) Next week we’ll do a costume fitting at Cozmos.
Once more the verbal warning flowed like wine. I think we were all insulted at one point or another…but she means well. We all got reamed about the necessity of wearing shit loads of make-up. Gaijin #3 was needlessly accused of dancing in her underwear. I think the fact that we’ll be wearing wigs saved me from “Get a real haircut! Kaytiichan!!Pay Money!!!” Gaijin #4 never made the meeting, but she is still our leader.
EDITOR'S NOTE: Gaijin #2 can't get the day off...and then there were 3...
This is gonna be a wacky fucking ride.