Buggirl's Increasingly Strange Tokyo Tales...

(crossposted to my Costumes page although it is in no-way shape or form costume related)

I need to unzip the last few weeks. Returning to a familiar bed, country and schedule has a way of temporarily negating all you have done and felt and leaves you feeling like there is something very important you have forgotten. 

But, I also know the full unzippening will unleash so much that it is best to start with the most accessible memory, the one already retold in tandem so often the pathways are well tramped down. 

So, yes, we will start with Santa. 

It is important to mention that Santa was drunk. Everyone was drunk.

 No, that is a lie. The paramedics were sober, bless them. 

( The Spirit moves folks in amusing ways. )

 

 

We'll package it like beer for kids! Who could object to that?

ReadyMade readers will be amused that "Children's Beverage" is still for sale. I am not ready to taste it yet.

(shown in special spring packaging, it usually looks more beer-like)

Unzen Lemonade! Look for the bottle with the Tori Amos female impersonator!

Time for a fan favorite:

What deadly drink does the 7-11 have for me tonight?


At first I thought, Deadly Snowberry Drink, you will not fool me twice!! But then I looked again. This clearly read Strawberry, not snowberry, and no mention of yogurt flavors. Okay, My Lovely Strawberry...in the basket you go.

It should be noted that the Japanese above "My Lovely Strawberry" does not actually read, "My Lovely Strawberry". It reads "Strawberry Confession" I assumed that the confession implied was "I'm a girlie-ass drunk!" but I was wrong. The confession, as far as I can surmise (now that I have partaken of the beverage) is thus:

My life is a lie. All those nights I ate dinner with you and praised your cooking, a lie. You see, I was born without taste buds...but I've never been able to tell you this, as food is so important to you, but when you see me drink this...you'll know.
( But wait, there's more )

I am not a huge fan of fruity drinks. But, alas, I am a sucker for random shiny cans of alcohol in Japanese convenience stores. I like to think of it as Dada, for my tummy. I ingest the random.

"Ooohh, you  new, shiny, and mysterious...you come home with me, kay?"

Which is why two nights ago I drank this:
( An accurate color. )

So, the assignment was "Draw a picture that shows something familiar with new uses." but it was phrased better. If you are familiar with Doraemon it was similar to asking them to draw an object or environment all tricked-out with great gadgets, like an Anywhere Door or a Beanie-hat-helicopter...or drawing the house that has everything.

The best part is that when they turned in the drawings they had to explain them to me. What with the nature of the drawings and my Japanese level, this was deliciously surreal.For example, I'm pretty sure that I wouldn't be able to decipher the relationship between the banana and the ninja in one of the pictures even if I was perfectly fluent!

( The featured drawing of the week )

 

,  A while back I was talking about that little game I play of review the lows from past winters. I mentioned the incident of making out with a boy from Bhutan in a tea ceremony room at an internationalization seminar. I didn’t mention that about a year later, totally sauced after two parties and one karaoke session with co-workers that I placed an ill-advised booty-call to that same tall drink of Bhutan water. Damn if his friends didn’t deliver him to my door by car.

( The rest of the story. )

You might have assumed that one of the things that can get lonely about living in a country where English is spoken only sporadically is the difficulty in having intense intelligent conversations. You’d be partly right. But when you find and intelligent person and you share some common language this can be achieved, it just takes longer and you may find that in clarifying your ideas for ease of communication, you also refine your thought process…

 

No, the thing I miss and if I even sense it in someone else I fall head over heals is…the ability to banter. Witty repartee. Fast and furious with the insults. Word play. Flinging invectives! Sarcasm… I love Raymond Chandler, Thin Man movies, the scene that Faulkner wrote for Big Sleep…my father and I insult each other for sport and family gatherings…Dorothy Parker is a start but I wanna be Wilde.

 

( Camp, part 4. Uno, this time its personal. )